Babyboomers

Posted by High Priestess Kang as Observations, Op/Ed

…also known as the most narcissistic generation of all time.

Because there is absolutely nothing on television tonight, the remote finds itself to the Hitler History Channel. Tom Brokaw’s documentary, 1968, is airing.

As a history buff, I will watch a respectable documentary (hold the dramatic reenactments, kplzthnx) about mostly anything. I qualify that because I really don’t want to watch the Civil War documentary cooking show, “Sherman’s cookin’ with fa-fa-fire!”

Back to the documentary. All you need to know is that it is the usual pandering, self-service drivel that is spoon fed to the Babyboomers. Advertising wonks and bored businessmen do this periodically, typically when they cannot find that extra benjamin in their wallet, to shake down some middle aged, arthritic, weekend warrior. I mean…let’s be realistic…we’re running out of ways to exploit this generation. How much lower can we go than Erectile Dysfunction drugs and therapies for Restless Leg Syndrome?

A commercial break, or reprieve, comes on. Lo and behold, it’s an advertisement catering directly to the Babyboomers; an internet community called, “Boomertowne.com” (and I quote from the commercial, “that’s town with an E!”). Out of morbid curiosity, I load the tripe. It’s cartoonish, a la The Jetsons. It’s geared towards - you guessed it - history’s greatest narcissists and looks to be some sort of irrelevant FaceBook for a quickly becoming irrelevant group of people (much to their chagrin). Naturally this website is supported by advertisements for Levitra.

Throughout the cycles of generations, there is one that typically gets lost. The, “Modern” era’s answer to that is Generation X. Surly. Snarky. Bitter. Pessimistic. Jaded. My generation (No, g-ddammit - not that shitty song by The Who). I’m not jealous that my generation is going to be the one that is overlooked. I’m relieved.

I’m relieved because I’m not going to be a shell of my former greatness, a cartoon, a mockery, a giant cliche, a monument to morphing into what one so bitterly resented as a child.

I could go on about my absolute disgust for the Boomers. I could. I just don’t want to.

But one last thing - Boomertowne, like the people it embodies, slowed down my laptop and caused the browser to crash. How fitting.