A little reflection…

Posted by High Priestess Kang as Kang scribbles

Today, it dawned on me that I have been back on American soil for an entire year with no adventures.  This realization prompted me to ruminate over the changes the last twelve months has brought.

KangWorld morphed from a blog into a website.  The website spawned a community and I’m having an absolute blast with it.  The phorum has provided me hours of enjoyment and an opportunity to get to know some of my cyber-peeps a lot better than I had imagined possible.  We have a wonderful group of regulars, some shy members and a good amount of lurkers.  To the shyer members and the lurkers, I should like to say, “Come on in!  The water is lovely this time of year.”  Although, the lurkers will need to send me an email requesting a logon.  The phorum is, after all, 100% numpty-free.

I have made some fantastic new friends (Sparky and Family Sparky including Lulu, who is running around my house right now, fascinated by the cats), lost a few friends, mourned a wonderful man who departed this great earth far too early, discovered a distant relative who has brought much joy to our family and strengthened existing relationships along the way.  Where humanity never fails to disappoint, it never fails to pleasantly surprise.  For every one douchebag I know, there are five fantastic people to sit with me and laugh at the douchebags.  It’s important to remember this and ensure those close to you know this.  Because, as we learned through Hawk’s passage, life is far too short and the gifts are far too precious.

Also, in the past months, I have managed to lose an enormous amount of weight, blood, strength and body parts.  Now that two of the offenders have been removed, I’m feeling quite spry.  The fevers are intermittent, the stomach upset still lingers but is far more manageable and I don’t hurk every time someone says, “You need to eat.”  It’s amazing what you miss feeling like absolute hell.  Returning to my flowers and garden has been fantastic.  I’m not sure if I’m more excited about the pretty posies or the fact that I could actually do 90% of the labor without having to take a nap or scream for Dock.

Health is another oft-overlooked gift.  Something we take for granted each day.  This message was cemented last weekend, when I met a group of extremely brave cancer patients who thumb their nose at this horrible disease and embody strength and positivity unlike anything I have seen.  So gracious they are, they made me an honorary, “Cancer Fighter.”  While I have often said, “There is no dignity in healthcare,” their spirit proves that statement entirely false.  There is dignity in healthcare.  It’s all in the way you carry yourself and fight what ails you.

Today, due to the extreme heat and humidity, I had a minor asthma attack.  Nothing overly dramatic.  Nothing major, actually.  I found myself at my desk at work thinking, “this too, will pass.”  And it did.  Without any drama at all.

From the lessons learned through the last year, the people I have met, the experiences I have had, I have discovered that I am becoming both physically and emotionally stronger.  I may still have problems with the auto-immune system.  But, I also have a deep bucket of inspiration from which to draw when I’m feeling the terriblest of the terriblest.  I have the memories of Hawk, the fortune to have met some of the most inspiring people in the world last weekend and a bracelet which is a metric ton of perspective in rubber form.

Like most things in life…events, circumstances and the like become niggling, little details when given the proper perspective.  I have been beyond fortunate to have had the opportunity to learn what perspective is.  What matters. What is important. 

As Daddy says, “You cannot buy an education like that.”

Exercise 1: The Reluctant I

Posted by High Priestess Kang as Kang scribbles

The Reluctant 1.  Write a first-person story in which you use the first person pronoun (I or me or my) only two times - but keep the I somehow important to the narrative you’re constructing.  The point of this exercise to imagine a narrator who is less interested in himself than what he is observing.  You can make your narrator someone who sees an interesting event in which he’s not necessarily a participant.  Or you can make him self-effacing, yet a major participant in the events related.  It is very important in this exercise to make sure your reader is not surprised, forty to fifty words into the piece, to realize this is first person narration.  Show us quickly who is observing the scene.  600 words.

 

The Office Root Canal
by High Priestess Kang 

The rolling eyes, the dramatic gesticulations, the raising of voices.  This is no way to solve a problem.  Watching these two people verbally eviscerate each other whilst drawing attention from every corner of the room is becoming unbearable.  Yet there is neither restraint nor respect exhibited from either party.  And now, I’m feeling extraordinarily uncomfortable, sitting among these warring factions trying to figure out if I should take leave or intervene.  After all, this is a ”discussion” about minutiae, of little impact to those around them.  This display of overtly aggressive behavior is nothing more than a monument to dick-swinging.  Nothing unlike we see daily in these parts, but regardless of frequency, why should anyone have to tolerate this?

Glancing around the room, it’s easy to see how uncomfortable the rest of the group is.  This dispute, as said earlier, has nothing to do with us.  Yet, being a member of the dysfunctional group that is our department, there is nothing one can do except sit like cigar store Indians, emotionless and wait for this latest blow-up to abate.  At times, the group will assemble post-blow up and review what we have witnessed.  A retelling, with a little embellishment for amusement’s sake, of the story.  Highlighting the funny and parsing the rhetoric has become part of the enjoyment.  Our coping mechanism has morphed into a little game for us to play.

Time passes and the dispute continues.  Sometimes there is a lull in the conversation.  There is still no regard for the spectators.  The two overly selfish, ego-maniacal argumentarians are peacocking for us.  And them.  As if anyone really gives a shit about what the drama du jour is about.  There are things to do and bearing witness to this overblown game of kindergarten antics is not one of them.

To the right sits a colleague who has no vested interest in his position.  He is a bit of a wise-ass but very competent.  One of those types who can be an utter asshole but provides so much value to the organization, nothing can be done to eliminate him as productivity would be reduced dramatically.  In other words, without him, output would be…um…average, at best.  Then again, we are civil servants.

Colleague is becoming increasingly annoyed.  He fidgets and fusses.  He’s rolling his eyes and mimicking the two self-absorbed, rabid ranters.  Now the focus of attention is divided.  Half of the room remains fixed on the cacophonous duo; the other half is focused on colleague.  He repeatedly slams his head on the conference table.  Snickering ensues.  Coming as a surprise to no one, the two blathering idiots are still trying to prove their point.  This argument has lasted so long, whatever the issue being contested has been long lost.  It is almost as if a bomb could drop on our building and these two assholes would still continue screaming at each other as death by fire would be the last things on their minds.

Then it happened.  The reprieve came.  But not in a peaceful way.  The argument was still full tilt when colleague takes his half-full cup of coffee and hurls it at the wall.  Everyone looks up in astonishment to see coffee trickling down the wall and fragments of the company mug on the floor.  Colleague sits there with a stone face, as if to say, “What did I do?”  My only thoughts was about the stain that the coffee would leave on that G-d awful, threaded wallpaper some “interior designer” thought would promote harmony, industry and creative problem solving abilities.

The room falls silent. Finally. 

The 3 a.m. Epiphany

Posted by High Priestess Kang as Kang scribbles

So here I sit.  Unemployed.

To keep my mind from turning into sludge from lack of use, I have decided to take the opportunity afforded to me (via a lot of free time) to expand my horizons as a writer.  In lieu of taking a class, which costs money I am trying to save, I decided to hit the local bookstore to buy a few manuals and workbooks, which costs less money than a class.  The first workbook I am going to use is:  The 3 a.m. Epiphany by Brian Kiteley.

My new goal, whilst looking for another form of gainful employment, is to complete one of these exercises a day.  And you…my lucky readership will have the opportunity to read my brain farts and shred them.  They will be appropriately tagged so everyone can see the difference from my homework vs my usual, verbal rambling. 

Again…when you see these posts, please withhold nothing.  Tell it like it is.  If it’s great, throw me a carrot.  If it sucks, bang me with the stick.

I’m really excited about this.  Let’s hope I do not become distracted or bored.